After a fun little discussion on da lookbook I decided to add a special section to the bloggio.
In an era that is so concerned with the environment and being “green”, it’s important to note that the cultural industries, like music, are getting involved. In his latest album, Top Dog and his friends Klondike Kat, Point Blank, Bam, Big-T, K-Ring, Murder One, Ganksta Rap, Icey Hott, G-Ride and more… get together to teach us common folk the proper way to dispose of trash, specifically hoes. Having never listened to the album I can only assume from the album cover that it’s a crash course on how to dispose properly of women.
You might find yourself in an urban area with a woman. She says something you do not find too appealing or she has done something off-putting. First, you find yourself a basketball court. I assume the net must be the regulation size. Anything less than 10 feet and you’re doing you and your hoe a disservice by not properly disposing of them. The backboard must be glass in order to ensure proper cleanliness procedures. Then politely lift your hoe by her legs and proceed to effortlessly jaunt into the air and place your hoe into the hoop. She’ll acted surprised, but she knows damn well why she’s in there. It is best to act cold-blooded while you dispose of your hoe. Save the tears for later.
Unfortunately, the album cover, and therefore probably the entire album, does not describe what happens to the hoe after dunk’n. I like to believe that she travels through time and space into a palace of judgement. There she is processed and accused or aquitted of any hoe-y misdeeds. If clean, she’ll be reincarnated as a bottom bitch for some don in the south of Chicago. If bad, she’ll end up in an Oklahoman meth lab. There is a hoe judgement day, y’all.
Like any act of courage and kindness this brings up a lot of good questions. Where can I get the items that comprise Top Dog’s outfit. Obviously, this is the proper hoe trash man attire. I’m pretty sure you can’t get that jacket at Burlington Coat Factory. What is the grace period between slam dunk’n a hoe and getting a new one? An hour? A minute? Like any act of research or article, this album cover leaves more questions than answers. But, we should recognize the strength it took to make this album in a world of British Petroleums that can’t even dispose of their hoes properly. Corporate responsibility does not stop at the big conglomerates. Small businesses should take care of how they dispose of their waste as well. Top Dog is not only a money-maker, but he is an Earth-SAVER.
Thank you, $Top Dog$