“That sucks”

"tell me all about it, fwend!"

This seems to be the only phrase I can ever conjure up when someone is explaining a somewhat unfortunate episode in their life.  Maybe they’re telling be about something that inconveniences them.  “That sucks.”  Well, here’s the thing.  I, more often than not, am A) tuning a person out or B) the most likely case, have nothing to add.  It’s not that I don’t care about people… I understand that people need to vent.  I do it all the time, and I’m not surprised when I get the “that sucks” from someone or its equivalent.  Sometimes it’s just the acknowledgement that something is awry is all we need.  So, “that sucks” is my go to.  But why do I say that?

I get complained to a lot.  For some reason people feel it’s okay to dump their entire metaphorical problem sack all over my proverbial face, but I’m okay with being there for a friend.  Many people are prudent with their complaining.  They don’t over do it.  They aren’t dramatic.  They talk out their problems, and I can accomodate that.

My blood pressure rises when people begin to shift into the dramatic.  I too often see or hear people move into that arena too often and too quickly



Because of the prevalence of this type of speaking out, I assume that all people will jump to this extreme first, until they’re brought down by some calming words.  But that isn’t always the case. I should listen more.

Of course, with new modes of communications and social media, exaggeration is way to get attention in an environment that is so muddled with noise and weighed down by the inane.  I get it.  I’ve done it before.  I still do it.  And, I will probably continue to do it from time to time.  We all get sad, lonely and/or self-loathing at times, but perspective might be the thing we all need before we send each other that ridiculously sad text/tweet/status update.

My friend said something the other day that really made me aware of what we’re mostly living with.  When describing her difficult day she referred to the events and circumstances as “first world problems”.  It was great!  My roommate and I always rail against people who use the term FML or FMAINTS.  They have no perspective.  You have food–some more than others (points to self).  You have shelter.  Some of you have jobs.  AND, most importantly, we all have futures.  Most of the people that read this blog are friends or acquaintances of mine.  Off the top of my head, I cannot think of one of you that has it TRULY awful and has no future.  If you don’t believe me, go down to El Salvador and talk to my cousins who had to pay their way though law school by working in the fields preparing chickens for market.  They had to fight tooth and nail for things that we take for granted here.

So, before you decide to FYLIDB, tell yourself, “Perspective…” I’m tired of hearing about your “lame” life.  I’m sure you’re tired of hearing about mine.


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